Would you rather have spiders crawl all over your face or get rejected by your summer crush? Would you rather starve for 30 days straight with no water or food and die or get rejected by your spouse you love so much and head for divorce? Rejection is something everyone wishes they could avoid because it leads to uncomfortable feelings of self doubt and the questioning of who you are as a person. Experiences like:
Being passed up on a promotion
The new dream job selects who they think is a better candidate for the role, “not you”.
The house you really wanted gets accepted by another bid for the same price
Your love interest refuses to post any pictures of the two of you on social media
You were denied the loan for the amount you needed
The person you thought you were going marry leaves you for someone else and then gets married 3 months later
You don’t get any calls or texts from a person you were excited to get to know and you moved to a new city and you have zero friends
You just found out you were being cheated on or lied to
You hear gossip behind your back from people you thought were your friends
The list can go on and on, they all trigger the same gut wrenching, questionable feelings about your self worth. Your mind can take you on a roller coaster ride down a worthless rabbit hole thinking of all the reasons why someone else is better than you, or why you’re not deserving of the (job, boyfriend, girlfriend, home, salary…).
One interesting study out of Stanford, researchers found that some take rejection harder than others
“We propose that people who see rejections as revealing a core truth about oneself ‘as a person,’ something about who they really are, may be more likely to struggle with recovery and carry rejection with them into the future.” (Lauren C. Howe, Carol S. Dweck)
But here’s the thing about rejection that we forget, you (and you alone) have the choice to either ruminate the rejected experience over and over and over again or to change the negative self sabotaging thoughts to powerful thoughts that will help you propel and move forward quickly. Your future self needs you to process and learn the insights from feeling rejected and not get stuck along the way.
As you move forward, here are FOUR key thought affirmations to practice and adopt into your daily meditation or simply think about when feelings of rejection surface. Think of these affirmations as a mind workout, you don’t get a six pack of abs abs doing sit ups once a year. Same goes for the mind, it may feel hard at first or like it’s not working when you think of the new positive thoughts. It takes time and energy, be consistent with yourself.
I am attracting all the right experiences in my life that serve my best self.
Trust that the Universe has your back and the right experiences are showing up in your life to help you create the best version of yourself.
I have courage to move forward quickly.
Whatever rejected experience you’re going through, you may feel defeated and that nothing is going right. “You got this” and courage is embedded in every cell of your body to move forward. What does that look like to You? Write down actions you describe as courageous and commit to yourself to do them.
I am vulnerable and accepting to my experiences.
It’s okay that you’re disappointed things didn’t go the way you anticipated. Be proud of yourself for being open to the possibility of that new job or love interest.
Trust the process and steps of your journey and believe by continuing to be vulnerable for opportunities come your way.
I am enough just the way I am. ?
This affirmation and believing it, will make any feelings of rejection dissipate quickly. Why? How? Believing it means that you know you are enough. Know how to shake things off and move forward living in the present.
Rejection is life’s way of redirecting you to your best version of your experience and answering to desires deep down (you may not even acknowledge yet). Courage, vulnerability, and feeling enough is all you need to move forward and attract the future that will lead to less rejection and more empowerment.